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Saturday, May 19, 2007

Blogs of Our Lives - Pilot Episode

The Characters:

We begin in a small corner of St. Blog's Parish, a thriving city community in Minnesota, where Ray, the local Catholic "scoop", is hard at work perusing headlines to bring to the Catholic Faithful who read his blog. He is also alert to forward on the latest offense against the Church to the local Catholic Defense League. Ray is a lifelong Catholic with his own past he shares only with his closest Catholic friends, and anyone else he cares to share it with, and has found a home by parish-hopping and featuring articles on "Great Parishes!". He used to be a combox jockey but finally started a blog at the urging of his good friends Adoro and Cathy. Now the local St. Blogs residents wouldn't be able to do without his information or his humor.

Ray's most recent story points to Cathy, the Recovering Dissident Catholic who is apparently still sporting the Chrism from her annointing on the Easter Vigil, during which she was Confirmed. The Holy Spirit has a good hold of her and she is calling us all to be committed Catholics and wear our beliefs as a badge of honor, for that is what it is! Keep an eye on Cathy to see where her always entertaining and informative observations will take us next! Of note in her ongoing saga, her family manse, as she calls it, recently sold, and while she has happy memories of the home, she has come to reaize that it's not really home if her loved ones aren't in it.

After all, a house is just a box you keep your stuff in while you hang out with the people you love the most.

More on Cathy...she used to attend the local black eye parish, the dissident of all dissident locales but clawed her way out of the pit through a grueling regimen lead by the Holy Spirit and a healthy dose of Truth to bolster her upwards. Now she's one of the strongest Catholics on the block.

Let's switch scenes now and pan over to the ever elusive Terry Nelson at Abbey Roads. . Terry has a past occassionally alluded to but never fully shared; a past to include residence at different monasteries, and a history akin to that of St. Augustine (who doesn't have that kind of history?), but found his way home to Mother Mary's arms. Unfortunately the road lead to a terrible position in a poisonous atmosphere of an allegedly Catholic business which he recently left. What is he going to do? The drama is ongoing, and in order to escape the notice of whatever powers that be, Terry takes on a new identity on a daily basis.

Terry has yet another informative post up today, lamenting the damage done by calumny and the care we all need to take to avoid gossip. Terry often gives moral voice to the failings we all seem to fall into on a regular basis. It's always good to go check out Terry's blogs, because one never knows what he's going to look like from day to day. What will Terry look like tomorrow?

Meanwhile, in another corner of St. Blog's Parish, Happy Catholic and her husband are celebrating their 23rd Wedding Anniversary. Congratulations to the happy couple and may they have many more!

Happy Catholic (Julie D.) is a staple in St. Blog's, perhaps the heart and soul of all those who know and read her work. She provides the wisdom of the sages in her daily pages, ever leading those who seek such wisdom closer to the Lord they seek. Whenever she is not sharing her faith she's sharing her recipes and working on her latest knitting project. If St. Blog's were a real parish, it would be wealthy indeed for people would come from near and far to experience her home-grown version of Catholic hospitality.

And Father V. over in the Cleveland area of St. Blog's is offering a challenge to his extended parish family - can YOU give all the responses to these common calls used during the Mass? Check in tomorrow over at Adam's Ale for the answers!

Fr. V. has been sharing his story little by little, leading from theater to seminary, finding humor in the every day and explaining the art around us that has nearly been lost by the extreme confusion that happened after the "reforms" of the Second Vatican Council. Fr. V. is a fan of people, parishioners, art, symbolism in liturgical art, education for the laity, holiness, the Pope, and "The Princess Bride." While he hasn't been "assigned" to St. Blog's for long, he's already a beloved spiritual leader among us and has experienced all the battles waged at the real life parish level, if subdued by the cybercharacter of the internet.

And what's a story without the mysterious MIA's?

Angela Messenger, one of the resident Canadians, RCIA instructor at a circular-in-architecture parish, has taken holiday to places unknown. Word on the street is that she's informed a few people as to how she can be reached, but the info is top secret and can't be shared among the general St. Blog's audience. A hush falls over the parish as everyone wonders if someone will leak her wherebouts...and if so, will she be in danger?

Or is she only visiting her family?

At Angela's parish, there is a broiling controversy surrounding the imminent destrction of a building that now houses the Adoration Chapel. Where to move it? What will this mean? And will her Pastor's attempts to place the altar and tabernacle in a place of reverence in spite of the poor "Spirit of Vatican 2" wreckovation architecture cause people to take their families and flee...or will moving Adoration to the main Sanctuary bring people flocking in worship of our Lord and foster Vocations for years to come?

The other missing woman is Ironic Catholic. All she left was a mysterious message:

Out of town
...until Monday. Have a good weekend, all!


What can this mean? Ironic's true identity is unknown. We know (because she says so on her blog) that she is a professor of Theology somewhere, she has been grading papers, and she is a fan of satire and caption cotests. Now she's on a secret retreat of some sort, and, unlike Angela, she didn't forward any contact information.

Hmm....time to get out the magnifying glass.

Sarah is another missing blogger. She's a farm wife and mother from Ohio with a wee little one and another on the way, and her voice has been absent, although she commented on the recent Catholic Carnival for last week. Did she run away when she heard the lambs screaming? Did she get lost in the pasture, or did she simply step in a cow pie and has been spending the week prying the damage from her shoe treads?

Is it significant that THREE women and no men from St. Blog's is missing? Are they in cahoots? Are they planning a takover of dissident parishes? Are they ringleaders?

Or have they really been kidnapped?

And what is the Catholic Church without a black eye somewhere?

This parish has all the doings and human failings of a regular church, coupled with the extreme confusion and even outright disobedience of your favorite dissidents! Check out the antics of Che' (not his real name - it really starts with a "B") the Music Minister, and Todd, the Music Director as they go at each other's throats. And will Che' find his missing red backback? And will the mysterious Keith, (whose marijuana-stuffed red backpack was found by the hapless and cluless Fr. Juno) get his weed back? And what's going to happen with Che's banners or the Myn's or Wymyn's groups?

Meanwhile, in West St. Blog's, Father Reichtsteig, the pyromniac priest, is up at arms about Ascension Thursday having been moved to Sunday, thus depriving the faithful of a Holy Day which is truly still in existence. He also, grasping reality, cautions the faithful that the current "advertisement" for priests is none other than a couple of antisocial losers promulgated by MTV in the 90's...how can this possibly be a good thing?

Stay tuned for the next episode and additional characters from....BLOGS OF OUR LIVES....



STAGE DIRECTION:

(music playing...)


Ave....Maria........gratia plena.....

16 comments:

Terry Nelson said...

What a riveting soap opera, to be sure!

Thanks!

onionboy said...

A bit like hosting the Catholic Carnival...perhaps you should.

Owen
luminousmiseries.ca
onionboy.ca

Adoro te Devote said...

Chandler..uh..I mean...Terry...thanks! :-)

onionboy ~ I think you should host a blog called "Luminus Miniseries" :-)

((I'm in a humorous mood tonight...this is a good thing.)))

Cathy_of_Alex said...

Adoro: Grueling workout out of the pit? LOL! Yes, it was. Though I make no claims to being one of the strongest Catholics on the block.

How will it end? Tune in next time....

The Ironic Catholic said...

Adoro, I have a tip for you. You are a great criminal justice mind. Angela and Sarah and I are in cahoots. We are trying to create the "be all end all" viral blogger quiz of all time. This requires great concentration and we are depending upon the inspiration of the Spirit at Pentecost. It is a mission from God, and we plead for your prayers.

Sarah and Angela, I hope you do not mind that I have spilled the beans.

Peace.

Adoro te Devote said...

Cathy ~

What's your plan for the next episode? How will you defeat the evil genius of your dissident friends as they plan a merger at your office with the ultimate goal of forcing you back to the Spirit of Vatican II parish????

And Ironic..

Should I delete your email? Was that meant for public eyes? Where are you? Should we send a hit squad for your captors?


To verify your identity, I'm going to need the words to the second verse of the Sanctus in E Minor...

The Ironic Catholic said...

Captive to the Spirit, Adoro....no hit squads necessary!

Um, the words to the Sanctus in E Minor? Well, most Glory and Praise music is written in EMinor (or D). Does that count?

Adoro te Devote said...

Ironic

The Glory and Praise? Really?!

Um.... (paging through Adoremus...)

Uh...

OK. How 'bout the Canon in "D", but I'm referring not to music but to Canon Law...or:

Complete this phrase for verification:

Ite, missa est.

(And you say....)

Sarah said...

I.C., if you're not careful, you'll give away the SECRETS of our PLAN! *gasp* *pause as I wipe my shoes...again* *pause as I push away a screaming lamb* Well, I'd better get back to our work before I catch the bug virus that's been going around Small Town. :)

tara said...

Blogs of our lives...LOL! Perhaps this is the Holy Spirit's way of introducing us all to each other?? We are somehow attracted to certain people, places, blogs, and we all effect various thoughts and reactions in the other--for a time we "hang out" and then we move on.

I had a best friend for about twelve years, she was so important to me, I could never imagine not being with her, then we seemed to change, go in separate directions--what once was so important was now over. It was not good, or bad, things just changed, we just changed.

Some "soap operas" last a lifetime others just seem to appear for a while, we learn, we grow, and then we continue on elsewhere. But what remains, is the structure--our experiences and connections have formed us into who we are now.

In the "Communion of Saints, the Holy Spirit sends us who we need, when we need them--God is so good, how hard he must work to plan our lives--and place the people (and blogs) that enrich, amuse, guide, and give us the love we need on our journey.

Fr. V said...

I love it!

How clever!

Made my day.

Julie D. said...

Imagine my surprise when I popped up as the kindly neighbor who is knitting and passing out cookies ... :-D

Rose said that my "home-grown version of Catholic hospitality" means I'm finally a Southerner. ha!

Ray from MN said...

Do I get to have veto power over who gets to play me?

Is Walter Brennan still around? Or Gabby Hayes?

Adoro te Devote said...

Fr. V. ~ Glad you like it! :-)

Julie D. ~ Glad to provide some validation as to your status. Does it matter that I'm a Yankee?

Ray ~ Silly! You're ALREADY playing YOU!

This is a Live Blog Opera!

Anonymous said...

Is the Spirit of Vatican II blog a parody? Thanks..sue

Adoro te Devote said...

sue...it is ABSOLUTELY a parody of parodies.

Keep reading it, and be sure to read the comments...you won't be able to stop laughing!