Bl. John Paul II on Dignity, Moral Conscience, and Redemption

The following is a paper I wrote back in 2007. The sources used are linked in hopes you will read them for yourself. This is not an exhaustive synthesis of the topic and is not meant to be so, but only placed  here in hopes you will take interest in one or more of the Encyclicals and other documents used.  Blessed John Paul II, pray for us! 

**     **     **

The theme of human dignity underscored and was continually interwoven among all of Blessed John Paul II’s writings, becoming the very foundation of his philosophy. With each letter or encyclical of his pontificate, he seemed to draw upon this and as an intimate part of the discussion, and linked this theme to the necessity of a developed moral conscience and how this is inherently necessary in the work of redemption.

Even prior to his pontificate, John Paul II saw a link in these themes, which he expressed in his poetry and theatrical writings. As George Weigel observed in Witness to Hope, “He was making an important point, ultimately theological in import…your lives, which seem like so many other lives, are in fact caught up in a great drama of sin and redemption. In that drama, human love will yield to the ‘pressure of reality’ and crumble unless it is completed and perfected in being conformed to a Love that is capable of fulfilling love’s longing for absolute fulfillment. The human drama ‘plays’, as it were, within the divine drama, a play of which God himself is both author and protagonist, creator and redeemer.” (Weigel, p. 117).

The definition of human dignity is somewhat complex. The foundation of the dignity of the human person first arises from the fact that he is the only of God’s creations to have been created entirely for Himself. Humanity is created in the very image and likeness of God and was given the great gift of free will; that being the ability to choose to accept or reject the love of God. It is within this power to choose the good that man finds his inherent dignity, and discovers his ability to transcend his own condition and will in favor of a true gift of self to God. However, it is within the dimension of love that this dignity is fully realized and understood. “Human nature, by the very fact that it was assumed, not absorbed, in Him, has been raised in us also to a dignity beyond compare.” (RH, 8). As humanity was created by love, for love, we find in John Paul II’s writings that it is impossible to comprehend the amazement of humanity without the consideration of the dimension of love and how it is actually love that is the very foundation of human dignity.

In the Garden of Eden, man’s dignity was lost through original sin; that being distrust of God and the willful and conscious rejection of His love. That is not to say that dignity was fully lost; rather, man’s understanding of the meaning of his life was lost and with that, the understanding of his inherent worth and dignity.

One of the defining elements of human dignity is human freedom. In Redemptor hominis , John Paul II declares, “…freedom…is the condition and basis for the human person’s true dignity.” (RH, 12). It is this very freedom, that when abused, undermines dignity for abuse of freedom is a rejection of God’s love and God’s will. John Paul II develops this theme throughout his texts and underscores the idea that sin is, at its foundation, a rupture in the relationship between God and man, which is why it offends man’s dignity. “As a rupture with God, sin is an act of disobedience by a creature who rejects, at least implicitly, the very one from whom he cam and who sustains him in life….Since by sinning man refuses to submit to God, his internal balance is also destroyed and it is precisely within himself that contradictions and conflicts arise.” (RP, 1). Sin has two elements, that being personal and social, and the social arises from the personal as it begins to impact the larger society. John Paul II discusses this at length in Redemptor hominis and how society itself, when it is not working within the boundaries established by God and guided by a moral conscience, ends up in conflict with human life and suppresses man’s realization of himself according to God’s will.

Dignity is inherently linked to moral conscience, for this is what separates man from all other created beings in that it allows him to recognize his sin and thus willingly choose to transcend his disobedience and cooperate with God in the restoration of the relationship that has been ruptured. “The conscience…is not an independent and exclusive capacity to decide what is good and what it evil. Rather there is profoundly imprinted upon it a principle of obedience vis-à-vis the objective norm which establishes and conditions the correspondence of its decisions with the commands and prohibitions which are at the basis of human behavior…” (DeV, 43).

Conscience is a divine gift within man, that voice of God, so to say, in a sense a recognition that if there is a Creator, there is an objective reference in order to determine good from evil.

John Paul II goes into great depth to explain how the Holy Spirit, the Advocate, who dwells within man, knows him to his depths and “convinces concerning sin”. He draws the connection to the judgment that has already taken place for the “father of lies”, giving a reference point to this final judgment, while pointing man to what is good and holy. “By becoming the ‘light of hearts’, that is the say the light of consciences, the Holy Spirit ‘convinces concerning sin,’ which is to say, he makes man realize his own evil and at the same time directs him toward what is good.” (DeV, 42). Through this intervention of the Holy Spirit, man learns to call good and evil by their proper names, and thus begins the moral tug of war as man must seek to overcome the evil that disrupts his relationship with God.

In both Redemptor hominis and Dominium et vivificantem, John Paul II discusses the words expressed by St. Paul, “We know that the law is spiritual; but I am carnal, sold under sin. I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate. Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good.” (Rom 7:14-16). This constant interior struggle is understood against the entire history of man, with reference to his very origins and linked always to the Cross of Christ. For it is Jesus Christ who, through his sacrifice and perfect obedience who demonstrated the Truth as the living Word, proving the objective norm to which man constantly strives to emulate. This objective norm, lived out on the Cross, provides in full relief the objective evil, leading to conversion, within which man turns from evil and seeks to restore his relationship with God. It is a gift of divine grace, requiring the cooperation of man who, even when convinced of sin, has the freedom to continue to reject God’s love or accept it, and as in the story of the Prodigal Son, return his love in a spirit of humility and repentance. It is here that we see the link to the Cross and how conscience must be linked to redemption. “Christ, precisely as the crucified one, is the word that does not pass away, and he is the one who stands at the door and knocks at the heart of every man, without restricting his freedom, but instead seeking to draw from this very freedom love, which is not only an act of solidarity with the suffering Son of Man, but also a kind of ‘mercy’ shown by each one of us to the Son of the eternal Father.” (DIM, 87).

Mercy is, at its heart, a fundamental concept with regard to moral conscience, redemption, and human dignity. Because it was a severing of the relationship with God at the core of the fall from grace, John Paul II demonstrates that it is mercy that acts to restore that relationship and thus, dignity. It can be further noted that the foundation of mercy is love, for love is the dimension that manifests mercy. In Dives en miseriacordia, this theme is developed in great detail through an exploration of the story of the Prodigal Son. We see how the father, in faithfulness to himself, is focused not on how the son had offended him and squandered his inheritance, but how his son could be restored to him. He was, “…totally concentrated upon the humanity of his lost son, upon his dignity.” (DIM, 57). It was the moral conscience of the Prodigal Son that made him aware of his sin, his offense against his father, and the rupture in their relationship, and as he returned to the father, he appealed to his mercy, somewhat defined as, “…a special power of love, which prevails over the sin and infidelity…” (DIM, 27).

John Paul II further addresses that this concept of mercy may seem to some to be damaging to dignity, however it is quite the contrary for, it is mercy that is the link from moral conscience to redemption. As we become convinced of our sin and aware of the harm caused through our own free will choices, we have the opportunity to approach the Father once again and appeal to His love for us. Just as the father of the prodigal son is faithful to himself, so is God faithful to himself, ready to restore the dignity of his creation. “This love is able to reach down to every prodigal son, to every human misery, and above all to every form of moral misery, to sin. When this happens, the person who is the object of mercy does not feel humiliated, but rather found again and ‘restored to value’” (DIM, 59).

It is through mercy that we meet the concept of redemption, which is “overcoming evil” (TMA, 7), the ultimate restoration of the dignity of man. The redemption that took place on the Cross redeemed us in an act of supreme justice, in expiation for our sins, for as St. Paul stated so simply, Jesus was “made to be sin, who knew now sin.” (2 Cor: 5:21). John Paul II explains that our redemption does not arise only out of the actions of Jesus Christ, but requires us also to cooperate with God, which itself is the definition of conversion. Just as it was free will that caused the fall from grace, so it is also free will that, choosing consciously to cooperate with God, restores our dignity. None of this can be understood apart from the mystery of the redemption, for it Jesus’ death and resurrection, “by the revelation of the mystery of the Father and His love, fully reveals man to man himself and makes his supreme calling clear.” (GS, 22). Jesus reveals through love the objective good, revealing our true dignity and calling to holiness in eternal union with the Father. We see, finally, following John Paul II’s thought process, that human dignity is lost through abuse of our freedom, restored through correct understanding of our freedom (moral conscience), and that it cannot be understood without reference to the sacrifice of love through Jesus Christ in the mystery of our Redemption.

***       ***       ***

Notes:  


Initials followed by a number correspond to the title of a document and the paragraph referenced. 
RH, 12, for example, is Redemptor hominis, paragraph 12. I did not link to scriptural passages or references. 


DIM:  Dives in miseriacordia, Rich in Mercy (Encyclical)
DeV:  Dominum et vivicantem, On the Holy Spirit in the Life of the Church (Encyclical)
GS:  Gaudium et Spes, Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World, (Vatican II Document, Pastoral Constitution)
RH:  Redemptor Hominis, the Redeemer of Man (Encyclical)
RP:  Reconciliatio et paenitentia: On Reconciliation and Penance (Apostolic Exhortation)
TIM: Tertio millennio adveniente: As the Third Millennium Draws Near (Apostolic Letter)

Blessed John Paul II

Beati Ioannis Pauli II, Ora Pro Nobis!!!

On Forgiveness

A few days ago, a reader queried,

I want to ask you about forgiveness. It's such a basic and integral part of our Faith and yet many people, like me, aren't entirely sure what it means. What are the steps for forgiveness? . To recieve forgiveness from the Almighty I must Repent, ask forgiveness and make penance. Are we to ask this same process for those seeking OUR forgiveness? It often seems by the way that people talk about forgiveness that it should be a simple thing...I am not always so sure.


One more thing. When does Forgiveness become Enabling?


Thanks for your questions, Jose!

You're not the first to ask, and you won't be the last. Let's break it down and get to the heart of the matter.

1. What IS forgiveness?

That's a great question! Perhaps, through common knowledge of both God and ourselves, we can come to a definition that will make the term more clear.

We know that we are fallen creatures and as such, we don't just offend God, but we frequently offend each other, and sometimes we do so on purpose.

How many of you are familiar with the cry of surrender from childhood games, "OK! I give!"

Some would say "UNCLE!" which is similar but the a heartfelt "I GIVE!" does a lot more both for we as the one who succumbs, and we who are victors. "I GIVE!" is a cry of humility, of surrender, and is a universal appeal for mercy. It is also an expression of implicit offering: "Whatever it is you want...I GIVE!" and often physically expressed by open arms and hands, showing that there are no hidden weapons, be they sticks, stones, M-180's or cream pies.

Forgiveness, then, belongs to the one who reigns, the one who is in control.. Forgiveness anticipates the surrender of the "enemy" and makes him a friend through the divine virtue of charity which wills the good of the other.

We as humans "forgive" when we recognize that we are all fallen, we all fall short, and we all merit Hell. When we are faced with an interlocutor, in knowing our own final end, it is much easier to gaze upon the faults of another and even if they don't ask, to surrender ourselves to their own faults in recognition that they have likely accepted our own as a foregone conclusion of our basic humanity. Even if they have not, we know that our own faults give us greater cause to accept the offenses of another.

John Paul II wrote extensively about the mercy of God, and in his Encyclical on that topic, Dives in miseriacordia, he discussed how mercy begets mercy. When we have experienced mercy, we learn also to extend it to others.

This is not a true definition but perhaps just an illustration.

2. How does one forgive? What are the steps?

Forgiveness is not so much a matter of "steps" as a matter of interior disposition.

In our fallen nature, we tend to turn even the simplest of things into a "process" and think that if we put that "process" in place, everything will go well. The first thing to realize is that we are human, not machines.

Forgiveness has, at it's core, relationship. In order for us to be offended, we must have some kind of relationship with the one who offended us. Certainly there are degrees of relationship, but for the most part, if we're hitting the confessional on Saturday afternoon to speak about forgiveness or the lack thereof, it's because of a real person we know and have injured in some way...or perhaps we have been injured by them. When we go before Our Lord with contrition

When it comes down to it, there are no "steps" to forgiveness.There's nothing complicated about forgiveness unless we make it so. It's what we choose to do...or do not.

Sometimes people are deeply, deeply wounded by the sins of another; so much so that they may believe they can never forgive the person who hurt them. An example of this might be a family whose daughter was abducted and murdered, or those families who lost loved ones in the September 11 terrorist attacks.

In cases where the offense is so great, that is where we need to lean on Christ and pray for HIM to forgive those who have hurt us. Perhaps when we begin that prayer, we may not truly desire it, but the willingness to hand it to Him can transform our own souls and heal our own wounds until one day, perhaps that forgiveness will become our own as well. We have to forgive others through Our Lord, who can bear all things on our behalf and on behalf of the offender.

3. The Sacrament of Confession follows a process of Repentance, Confession, and Penance. 

Yes, it does. If we are asking God for forgiveness, we'd better be sorry for what we have done. If we aren't...the Confession is invalid, no matter what the Priest says. God knows our hearts and souls and we can't fudge Him.

So, yes, we must be truly sorry and intend to do better. We must confess our sins, and then we must "make satisfaction" which is the penance given by the Priest. Have you ever noticed that no matter what horrible things you have done, the prayers you are told to offer don't even TOUCH the offense in most cases?

There is a reason for that: it is because we can NEVER make satisfaction for our sins. Only the Son of God can do that, but we are called to participate in that offering. I can give this concrete example:

One day after an hour of my regularly scheduled prayer in the Perpetual Adoration chapel I went to Confession, and I had things to do afterward, but decided to go to Confession anyway in a brief window open to me. I confessed sins relating to impatience, but had no mortal sins. Overall, it was a pretty benign Confession!

The Priest gave me the penance of an entire Rosary, which was HUGE for this particular Priest who was known for his...uh..benevolence.(very Holy priest, very lenient penances).

I accepted my penance and returned to my place, actually grumbling about it! I'd been there an hour, I'd already prayed a Rosary and I hadn't had anything serious to confess! I had to get this over with, and quickly as I had to GO!

And that's when it hit me:  uh...yeah. Impatience.  In my own immediate sin of impatience after confessing impatience, I couldn't even complete my assigned penance without complaint! That lesson hit me right where it counted:  heart and soul.

Do you see?

4. Does what God asks us to do apply also to those who offend US?

Yes, He does, although not necessarily in the same way.

This question is best answered by the Catechism of the Catholic Church in the section on Christian Prayer on the topic of the Lord's Prayer, the "Our Father".

First, we are called throughout scripture to be holy and perfect as our Father in Heaven is holy and perfect. It is made clear that a facet of His perfection is His forgiveness and mercy for sinners; that teaching is a living reality. Jesus stated very clearly that we must pray for those who persecute us, to love our enemies, and to "turn the other cheek." If our Father in heaven forgives us, who are we to refuse to do the same?

If we are to be like Him, we must be willing to suffer much and still stretch our own arms out to our sides, vulnerable to attack and give ourselves up in love to anything that does not require us to commit mortal sin.

The teachings on Our Lord's Prayer as it applies to forgiveness is found in CCC paragraphs 2838 -2845. Please note that the teaching does not begin or end there, but is encompassed in all of Catholic teaching and throughout the life of Christ as expressed in the scriptures.

In short, must we forgive others as Christ forgives us:  YES! To do differently is to deny Him entirely.

5. What keeps forgiveness from being enabling?

Keep this in mind:  we are called to holy obedience and growth in relationship with Christ to forgive...not to forget. Never does He say we must forget.

Jesus does not call us to be doormats without a cause.

To understand this, we have to first understand the true definition of charity (divine love):  True Charity wills the good of another. Not just the temporal good, but the ETERNAL good, for that is what we are here on earth to obtain: Eternal beatitude with God.

We have to ask ourselves, in every moment, "What is the most loving thing?"

It is not enabling to forgive. It is enabling to turn a blind eye, to refuse to see what is there and to say nothing to someone we know and love and CAN speak to. It is enabling to recognize a problem in a person who is a mere acquaintance and refuse to bring it to the attention of those who do know that person in hopes they will intervene if necessary.

It is enabling to forgive and not maintain boundaries, for real forgiveness holds the sinner accountable for their actions.

That is the difference:  Forgiveness exists for the sake of Holy Conversion of heart and soul. It is to bring us closer to God, to help us to recognize who we are in His sight, and to recognize His supreme authority and ability to heal us of even the most dire offenses. If Our Lord can forgive us our offenses, it stands to reason that we, too must extend that same kind of mercy towards those who offend us as well.

 **     **     **

Jose, I hope this helped, at least a little. If you're a reader, I do highly recommend that you read Dives in Miseriacordia (linked above) as well as the passages in the CCC that of course are far more succinct and to the point than I will ever be!

If something I said here doesn't make sense, please feel free to ask - I never can claim to be free from error! ;-)

What do you seek when you dream of happiness?

This is a repost from October 2007, something always fitting for Friday, for throughout the year, on every Friday, we especially recall the Passion of Our Lord.



It is Jesus in fact that you seek when you dream of happiness, he is waiting for you when nothing else you find satisfies you; he is the beauty to which you are so attracted; it is he who provokes you with that thirst for fullness that will not let you settle for compromise; it is he who urges you to shed the masks of a false life; it is he who reads in your hearts your most genuine choices, the choices that others try to stifle.

It is Jesus who stirs in you the desire to do something great with your lives, the will to follow an ideal, the refusal to allow yourselves to be grounded down by mediocrity, the courage to commit yourselves humbly and patiently to improving yourselves and society, making the world more human and more fraternal.

~ John Paul II, World Youth Day, 2000 (Rome)

I have said before that I realized my life makes no sense apart from the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ; as time goes on, this realization is coming to be ever more meaningful. When I look at a crucifix and see the sacrifice of my Savior, it is clear that there is nothing more important than that, anywhere. If I never read another word, if I never sleep another night, if I never see another day, it doesn't matter; because Jesus' death on the cross reveals everything. That very moment in time is the meaning of life and the answer to death. All I have to do, for the rest of my life, is to look upon that cross...and become so enamored and unified that I become a living reflection, and let no other worldly concern pull me away from that goal of the perfection of charity. To love as God loves, that completely self-giving and wholly-self-sacrificing love.

God has willed us into being, out of his perfect love, and he holds us in existance. His grace is everything yet he requires but one thing from us: our willingness to cooperate with His plan for our lives. God calls us, each and every one, by our names, quietly guiding us, revealing his plan step by step. Each moment, we have a choice; accept or reject God's plan? Every moment of every day, we live out our choices and consequences of those choices, and each one either leads us toward the cross and self-sacrificing love, or causes us to flee into the selfishness of our own desires. There is always an option; do we act out of love? Or do we flee from the shadow of the cross?

Ultimately we must make that choice; are we willing to be crucified alongside our Lord, our happiness aligned with the deepest gift of self in accordance with God's own plan for us? Are we willing to offer ourselves to God every moment of every day?

Our own greatness resides in our humble acquiescence to walk in accordance with God's holy designs upon our lives. We are called to be holy; we are created for love, and we are formed to love as God loves.

When we look upon the cross, we should understand that this suffering is in fact the perfection of charity to which we should all aspire. And there is no greater glory to offer to God than to abandon ourselves and our entire lives into His loving hands.

*

Keeping Watch

Our Lord asks, "Can't you keep watch with me for even one hour?"

A couple years ago, in reading Salvifici doloros and Dives in miseriacordia in my John Paul II class, I was brought to my knees in contemplation of the fact that the mercy of God elicits mercy in ourselves. We cannot behold the suffering visage of Christ without ignoring the fact that His condition elicits mercy. 

We cannot offer mercy without becoming entangled within the suffering itself.  

I've written of this a few times, with no comment, for apparently the image that means the most to me leaves others indifferent, and there's nothing wrong with that.  But know that this is an image that I am going to come back to again and again, because theologically, it's important for us all to understand, and it is a point of conversion.  I didn't invent it;  I'm only experiencing the truth of it, and understanding it because of the writings of our dear Pope John Paul II.  

The Passion of Our Lord

When I ponder offering mercy to Our Lord in His Passion, I envision reaching out to the crown of thorns, seeing how they dig and tear into the tender flesh of His head, how heavily the wounds bleed, how hard the enormous thorns pull at His hair which further pulls them into His scalp.  His torturers had POUNDED those thorns beyond His flesh and into his skull.

What terrible agony, what piercing pain, and how the blood must have covered Him, blinding him as it cascaded into His eyes!  

Yet, in that awful suffering, He spoke not a word of rebuke. It was all suffered in perfect silence. 

In the Garden of Gethsemane, in His worst Agony, Jesus knew what was to come, and sweated blood, an actual biological condition.  He felt every blow. He was primed for every scourge. He knew every inch of suffering that awaited, and then befell him.  He knew the sort of suffering and death that was His to bear, for He had first sentenced us to it and then underwent this punishment Himself for we could not have withstood it.  

His moment of abandonment on the Cross, when He surrendered to all, and willfully gave up His spirit...this is the moment to which we all seek to ascend.  Not in morbidity, but in triumph. Not at our own hands, but at the hands of God who knows the proper moment, who calls us to abandonment. 

Knowing this, seeing this, how can we NOT seek to offer mercy?  How can we NOT desire to follow Him to the culmination of His Passion?  

Yet, if we seek to relieve Him, what happens?  In the Garden, if we reach out, does not the blood that He sweats also cover us?  If we seek to offer mercy when He is scourged, how can we unless we stand between the executioners and Our Lord, and allow ourselves to be beaten as well?  Can we offer Him mercy in that moment without taking on that same scourge as that which tears His own flesh from His bones?  

If we seek to relieve Him of the pain from His crown of thorns, is it possible to remove it without being punctured by those same bloody flesh-ripping points?  

Isn't it likely, that if we reach out to Our Lord in mercy, it means we MUST allow ourselves to be entangled within His own suffering, which He undertook for us?  

If we want to offer mercy as we follow Jesus to Calvary, does it not mean that we'll fall a few times?  And just as He was not alone when He fell, if we are in His steps, doesn't it stand to reason another might be conscripted to attend to us?  Perhaps we are the ones sent, but maybe we also need assistance to continue on the way. 

Finally, if we desire to offer mercy to Christ as He is nailed to the cross, perhaps we are not all called to suffer such a death, but are we not called to be PRESENT?  To remain with Him, identified with Him, villified with Him, spat upon with Him, and completely dismissed...with HIM?  

When Jesus asked His disciples to keep watch with Him, He was asking for mercy, but only a little.  In his humility, He did not ask for more, for He knew that real love REQUIRES far more than simply keeping watch.  

Yet, keeping watch is a step, and one that means a great deal. We see in scripture the consolation of the angel in His agony, and some Saints have suggested that the angel represents those souls who desire to be present with Christ, offering Him strength for what He is to do.  Simple human presence, empathy, sympathy.  Caring. 

I got a new perspective on this recently. 

For so long now, I've been so lost in wandering.  Seeing a star but not knowing how to get there to bask in the light.  Last weekend I felt totally abandoned, so lost I thought I could not find my way out.  I was headed to join Judas in the field of blood.  

Upon sharing my defeat with my spiritual director, suddenly I realized the value of having someone else present in the midst of a trial. I realized the other side of suffering alone, and then having someone there who is willing to take on some of that suffering.  To know that each and every scourge to come belongs to me alone, but someone else would be there who knows what it is about and won't leave me to bear it alone. 

Someone who can help me be Peter and not Judas, Mary and not Martha.  

Jeus asks us to keep watch with Him; He asks for our presence, He asks us in the utmost simplicity the easiest thing we have to offer:   ourselves, our presence.  

And if we offer that, He draws us to Him, inviting our mercy. It is that very mercy that draws us further into the depths of Salvation. 

Are any of us keeping watch with Christ tonight, or are we fleeing to the field of blood to be lost forever?

Jesus asks us to keep watch with Him.  He knows, and we know, that ultimately, this is not what He asks.  Keeping watch is the first step, and if we truly love Him, we won't just keep watch, but enter into the full experience of His Passion and death, ultimately reaching for the Resurrection. 

I am so grateful to finally understand the gift of not being alone in the Garden; I'll never read the Passion accounts in the same way again.  I'll never ponder the Agony in the Garden in the same way again, for I think I have finally experienced the simple consolation asked by Our Lord to His Apostles. 

Thank you, Jesus. Give me the grace to follow You through the Cross into the Resurrection. 

You CANNOT be Christian and Support Abortion!

This post was originally published on June 22, 2007. Given that Advent begins in a week, and given that this weekend we celebrate the Feast of Christ the King, I can think of no better way to honor Him than by fighting for the life of the unborn by citing Jesus as the most perfect example of an "unplanned pregnancy." Those who profess to believe in Christ speak with forked tongues if they proclaim Christ in one moment and deny life to the unborn in the next.

In the sixth month, the angel Gabriel was sent from God to a town of Galilee called Nazareth,
27 to a virgin betrothed to a man named Joseph, of the house of David, and the virgin's name was Mary.
28 And coming to her, he said, "Hail, favored one! The Lord is with you."
29 But she was greatly troubled at what was said and pondered what sort of greeting this might be.
30 Then the angel said to her, "Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God.
31 Behold, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you shall name him Jesus.
32 He will be great and will be called Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give him the throne of David his father,
33 and he will rule over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end."
34 But Mary said to the angel, "How can this be, since I have no relations with a man?"
35 And the angel said to her in reply, "The holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. Therefore the child to be born will be called holy, the Son of God.
36 And behold, Elizabeth, your relative, has also conceived a son in her old age, and this is the sixth month for her who was called barren;
37 for nothing will be impossible for God."
38 Mary said, "Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word." Then the angel departed from her.
39 During those days Mary set out and traveled to the hill country in haste to a town of Judah,
40 where she entered the house of Zechariah and greeted Elizabeth.
41 When Elizabeth heard Mary's greeting, the infant leaped in her womb, and Elizabeth, filled with the holy Spirit,
42 cried out in a loud voice and said, "Most blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb.
43 And how does this happen to me, that the mother of my Lord should come to me?
44 For at the moment the sound of your greeting reached my ears, the infant in my womb leaped for joy.
45 Blessed are you who believed that what was spoken to you by the Lord would be fulfilled."

It is not possible to be a Christian and support the "right" to an abortion. It is not possible to be a Catholic Christian and support the "right" to abortion. You certainly have a choice...you are EITHER what society calls "Pro-Choice", OR you are a Christian.

If this is not clear to you, re-read the text of Luke 1 which I posted above. Especially focus on the parts in bold.

When the angel appeared to the Virgin Mary, he announced to her she would conceive and bear a son to be named Jesus. The birth of Jesus would follow the conception, because that's how it works. The angel did not announce to her that she would conceive and lay and egg...he announced that the Holy Spirit would overshadow her, and AT THAT MOMENT she would conceive in her womb the Christ, the Holy Redeemer.

Something very special happens to each woman at the moment of conception, the very same thing that happened to Mary when she conceived Jesus by the power of the Holy Spirit. Every single human life begins in the same way; with a touch from God, a touch that infuses body and soul together, forming a complete human life in the most minute detail.

When the Holy Spirit overshadowed the Blessed Mother, the human and Divine nature of Jesus were fused together. As we know that Jesus, born of a human woman, was fully human in all ways, we also know that he was fully Divine.

Any Christian would certainly be offended at the idea that Jesus was a lump of flesh or just a conglomeration of cells until he was born. Scripture clearly spells out the fact that the children in the wombs of Mary and Elizabeth were, in fact, children, not accidents of the universe. They were not cancer, they were not impersonal "fetuses"; no, they were CHILDREN, they were God's wonderful and abundant blessings, and through the womb of Mary, the Mother of God, Jesus, both Human and Divine, emerged to redeem humanity.

He did not become Jesus from birth; he was Jesus from conception.

Christ, the Redeemer of the world, is the one who penetrated in a unique unrepeatable way into the mystery of man and entered his "heart". Rightly therefore does the Second Vatican Council teach: "The truth is that only in the mystery of the Incarnate Word does the mystery of man take on light. For Adam, the first man, was a type of him who was to come (Rom 5:14), Christ the Lord. Christ the new Adam, in the very revelation of the mystery of the Father and of his love, fully reveals man to himself and brings to light his most high calling". And the Council continues: "He who is the 'image of the invisible God' (Col 1:15), is himself the perfect man who has restored in the children of Adam that likeness to God which had been disfigured ever since the first sin. Human nature, by the very fact that is was assumed, not absorbed, in him, has been raised in us also to a dignity beyond compare. For, by his Incarnation, he, the son of God, in a certain way united himself with each man. He worked with human hands, he thought with a human mind. He acted with a human will, and with a human heart he loved. Born of the Virgin Mary, he has truly been made one of us, like to us in all things except sin"47, he, the Redeemer of man.(RH, 8)

From the very moment of his Conception, Jesus was both God and Man; as by his conception he dignified humanity even further, it cannot be denied that EACH AND EVERY HUMAN LIFE has an innate dignity, raised even even more by virtue of the Incarnation of God, the Word made Flesh who dwelt among us (John 1), showing us by EXAMPLE of his very own CONCEPTION that this is a child of God FROM THAT VERY MOMENT!

I can understand how atheists or agnostics or religions that do not believe in the Virgin Birth can argue when life begins. But I simply cannot FATHOM how those who claim to be Christian, redeemed by the blood of the Lamb, can support the unmitigated and unquestioned slaughter of the unborn children of God. The reality is that the Holy Spirit overshadows all women at the time of conception in order for the soul to be infused into the moment of conception; God touches each one of us at that moment. God touches each woman especially at that moment, a blessing of life, a blessing of love, in the creation of a unique human being designed from the beginning to grow according to the will of God.

If you have the audacity to claim that abortion is an authentic "right", then at least have the integrity to announce you are no longer a Christian. To do anything else is to deny the Lord, the Redeemer who shed his blood so that you might live and have eternal life.

Should you be faced with an unexpected pregnancy, spend some time meditating on the passages of Luke, on Mary's fiat ("let it be done unto me according to your Word"), meditate on the face of the Crucified Christ, place your hand over your womb where that child grows, and consider how God has literally touched you and the life you carry within you. Imagine the face of the Christ child, the infant, and realize that just as Jesus, who loves you enough to die a horrible death for you, loves your child just as much. Imagine how the two natures of God, both Human and Divine, were joined at the moment of Jesus' conception, just as the body and soul of your unborn child were also joined in that same blessed moment.

Do any of us really want to deny life to any of the children of God? To do so is to justify the abortion of Christ Himself.


Bibliography:

"The Redeemer of Man (Redemptor hominis), Encyclical Letter of Pope John Paul II", Pauline Books & Media, 1979, p. 16

Original Solitude

This morning I attended a small conference, which meets every month, designed for DRE's and Youth Ministers. The topic was with regard to Theology of the Body, the speaker was wonderful, and as usual, I was struck by the simplicity of the concepts...and how they apply to all of us.

A couple things hit me; the first was with regard to "the call" given to those who serve in ministry in some form, be it priest, religious, or lay ministry. Always, when someone talks about us being "called" to where we are, I am completely humbled...what am I doing here? God called ME?

It's shock. Complete shock. I look back upon my past, I see in a flash the last several years...and I can't feel anything but a mix of relief, humble recognition of my sinfulness, and the love of God. The focal point behind the speaker was a large crucifix; and every time I heard the word "call", my eyes and heart shifted to that image.

Seriously. I don't really understand how I got here. I have no idea how I went from where I was to where I am now; a student of Graduate Theology, staff in a parish, a faithful Catholic. How did God do this?

And of course, the speaker began then, and at the beginning, she spoke of, naturally, the beginning for us all, the beginning of John Paul II's Theology of the Body.

The first concept was original solitude; God created Adam, in His own image and likeness, and bade him to have a blast in naming the animals. This Adam did, and indeed, had a great time. So there he was, in the company of the animals, recognizing the gifts of God, recognizing all that he had, recognizing that God's creation was wonderful. But upon reflection, he realized there was no one like him, and he recognized his lonliness.

Man was alone; he saw that he was different from the rest of creation, he saw that he had the gift of self-determination, something all the animals did not have. He saw that he had an inherent dignity in his relationship with God that was not possessed by the rest of Creation.

He stood alone before God; he stood naked before the Lord, realizing who and what he was, and God also recognized that it was not proper for Man to be alone.

Skip ahead a few millenia, and we look at our world today. Things are a mess, are they not? Our fallen nature has lead us through disastrous catastrophes, with the current culmination of the slaughter of thousands and millions of children upon the altar of the god of self-loving inconvenience. We have seen the wars, the destruction of life, the loss of our sense of who we are because we cannot see God, and our society simply doesn't care.

Today I also realized that not only have we fallen so far, but this lesson is even more personal. It was a moment of that self-knowledge that comes only by the grace of God, right on the heels of the sense of "calling".

In reflecting, I realized that God has called me to my own personal "original solitude". In answer to my prayers and struggles of the past, God has taken me through years of sludge and rejection of Him, has helped me redefine happiness, and has delivered me from the darkness of those years. Where has He brought me, exactly?

To the beginning. To original solitude.

I live alone. God saw that I was alone, and so gave me a dog, which I named. But she is not like me; I must train her, I must feed her, I must care for her, because she can do none of this on her own. In her original nature, she does not have the ability to care for herself or even think beyond a short period of time. I love her and thank God for the gift of this pet, and it's nice to come home from work to a joyful greeting. She makes me sleep better because she is protective; she reminds me of God's love in moments of isolation, and she makes my life better, if not easier.

But then enter the solitude; she is not like me. It is not natural that a woman (or man, for that matter) be alone. The natural world is a gift, but it is not a substitute.

Every so often I stop and realize that I am alone and totally dependent upon God, and while He has been very good to me and in his faithfulness to Himself will continue to be so, I am still alone.

I do not look at this only from the perspective of marriage because the reality of our human existance covers so much more. Instead, I consider that, throughout history, it was never proper for women to live alone. Single women lived with their families. Married couples lived with their families. There were provisions to care for widows, especially widows with children.

We all suffer from the Fall, and Jesus came to ransom us with His blood, but the effects of the original sin remains in our natures. Our disobedience is ingrained; our understanding of love is twisted, and our definition of happiness is warped beyond recognition.

And although Jesus died for us, our sin have continued from generation to generation. It is a domino effect; once it has begun, it cannot be stopped, so the sins of the fathers are visited upon the next generation...and the sins of their sons have effects to the next generation, and the sins of the grandsons...and the effects continue. From the Fall, there has been a snowball effect, for each generation suffers and reacts to the sins of the previous generation.

It is ongoing. Jesus saved us with his blood by opening the gates of Heaven; without his blood, without his own fulfillment of the covenant, there would be no Salvation. Yet God allows us to live out our decisions, watch the effects of our sins, and stands ever ready, ever reaching for us, ready to offer us mercy.

Yet in this warped world, things have gone so awry; our dignity is constantly undermined. We damage each other and call it "love" when it is anything but love.

And in this world, even as we seek the company of others, we still stand alone before God, naked, ashamed, but unable to look into His eyes.

I have come to see that the Single state was never intended, just as Death was never intended; indeed, it is unnatural to be alone. We are meant to love and be loved, within God's original and fully self-sacrificing love. We are meant to live for others, not for ourselves, but the battle that rages within us is between the love of God and the love of the world.

The very reality of the solitude so prevalent in our socity is nothing short of disturbing, for at its core, it shows how far we have fallen. How is it that the evil one has managed to separate the ewes from the flock; the better to take them down?

And we have cooperated.

I do not believe that all women are meant to marry, nor are all men meant to marry. I believe that the majority of people are called to the priesthood, religious life, or married life. But there are some souls God calls to His own purposes, and they have existed since the Fall. Yet it seems unprecedented that people live alone in houses with their pets.

It is unnatural.

That solitude is a lonliness; not in the pithy lonliness of poetry and prose, but a deeper lonliness which recognizes that solitude before God is something we all experience. We recognize that we all stand alone, and in that lonliness of solitude, we see who we are, and who God is; and we are convicted in His love.

I have come to realize that my current state in life is related to this original solitude; God has taken me to a place where I can face Him and Him alone, I stand, in lonely solitude. Even as He sends me into the world each and every day, to serve Him and His people, in the end, I am alone before him. Single. Solitary.

And from the depths of this solitude, from the depths of my sinful soul, from the depths of my disordered sense of love, from the depths of my warped idea of happiness, I thank God for seeing me for who and what I am...and leading me ever closer to knowing the true definition of what it means to look into His eyes and understand what it means to be made in the image and likeness of God.

Slander of Vatican II and the Tridentine Mass

I am constantly shaking my head over people who claim to be "Catholic" and embrace Vatican II...yet by their comments, they have clearly never bothered to read what the documents actually said. Nor do they have any idea what it means to be Catholic.

Pope John Paul II dedicated his pontificate to Vatican II, so time and time again TOLD PEOPLE TO READ THE DOCUMENTS!!! And yet, here we are, with ignorance being spewed, and now the Old Mass being slandered right along with Vatican II. If these people understood how foolish they are for speaking such nonsense, they might never speak again. I know I used to feel that way once I took the time to ask my questions...and was confronted with reality. It's embarassing to be caught with one's foot deeply inserted into one's mouth.

What is causing this tirade? Thanks for asking. Check out this article, of which I will post excerpts of special interest.

But the Latin Mass has stirred controversy — partly because its Good Friday liturgy includes an explicit prayer for the conversion of Jews and refers to their "blindness" and "darkness."

Actually, my understanding is that this is complete fallacy. While the original text specifically prayed for the conversion of the Jews, the current translation which is to be used has removed this language. Can someone verify this for me, and those for whom it is a concern?

As far as my own opinion goes (it's my blog; I get to share my opinions, shrinking violet that I am), I am happy to admit I do pray for the conversion of the Jews to the fullness of the faith, for the Messiah has come, and He came for them, too, if they but had eyes to see. If we are Catholic, then we SHOULD be praying for the conversion of the Jews, for don't we want them to have what we have? Aren't we praying for the conversion of the Baptists, the Evangelicals, the Muslims, the Atheists, the Agnostics, the Buddhists, the Hindus, etc etc? If we are praying for all religions EXCEPT those who embrace Judaism, doesn't that make us anti-semite???

Give me a break! It's our CALL to pray for the conversion of all those NOT CATHOLIC! Ecumenism is not about watering down our faith and making it palatable to those who disagree; rather, ecumenism is about sharing our faith and praying that others embrace it and come into the fullness of the Catholic Church.

Which, brings us to the next quote:

The more conciliatory post-Vatican II language calls the Jews "the first to hear the word of God" and prays for them to "arrive at the fullness of redemption."

Um, that post-Vatican II language is another way of saying "conversion". Thank you for making my point. Or rather, the Church's point.

But Kathleen Kennedy, a Catholic from Swatara Twp., said the old language troubles her. "I think the problem is that Christianity has such a poor track record of interacting with Jews and Judaism," she said

Hi, Kathleen. Maybe that's partly true, but have you ever heard of a small, little-known Pope by the name of John Paul II? Or what about "Hitler's Pope" who was anything but, and actually saved THOUSANDS of Jews during the Holocaust? Please study history...apart from the popular media, that is, because they never get it right...even current affairs.

Some Catholics are dismayed by the direction of the pope, who recently not only encouraged wider celebration of the Latin Mass but asserted that Protestant and Orthodox churches are defective.

That's not what Pope Benedict XVI said. Rather, if these "Catholics" had bothered to actually READ what was said, the actual words of the Pope and not what the Washington Times or The Journal of American Idiocy, or whatever News Rag they like to read reported he said, they would realize that the Pope simply reasserted Catholic teaching. And in fact, the Pope stated the Truth; that the Catholic Church is the fullness of the faith, and other Christian religions, while they have a portion of the Truth, do not have ALL of it. We, as Catholics, members of the Church instituted by Christ, have what is called the fullness of the faith. Thus, this is the reason other Christian Churches are called "denominations." The prefix to the term "Denomination" indicates a subtraction. Thus, all other Christian faiths are missing part of the equation. The Catholic Church is NOT a "denomination". We have it all, and to state otherwise is a betrayal of Christ. Do we expect the Christian Denominations to agree with us? No. Nor did the Pope. His audience was not the world in that particular address, but rather, he was speaking to Catholics, his primary flock.

"I remember Vatican II with great joy, and I am so saddened that there seems to be a move by this pope to make it a thing of the past or even say it was misguided," said a eucharistic minister from Lemoyne, asking not to be identified for fear of offending people she serves.

OK, first of all, let's correct the term "Eucharistic Minister." The ONLY Eucharistic Ministers are men ordained as priests or deacons. (Holy Orders) Period. The proper term for the laity who assist in the distribution of the Blessed Sacrament during Mass, or to hospitals and the homebound is "Extraordinary Minister of Holy Communion", or "EHMC", or "Extraordinary Minister", for their ministry is extraordinary, not formal.

Now that that bit of catechesis is out of the way; His Holiness Benedict XVI IS reinforcing what Vatican II actually taught. He is not, contrary to popular ignorance, making it a "thing of the past." In fact, it's clear he is completely EMBRACING Vatican II and trying to help us all do the same.

In the document on the Liturgy, Sacrosanctum Concilium, which is the Vatican II document most abused, slandered and libeled, it states very clearly:

ARTICLE 36. 1. Particular law remaining in force, the use of the Latin language is to be preserved in the Latin rites

ARTICLE 54. In Masses which are celebrated with the people, a suitable place may be allotted to their mother tongue. This is to apply in the first place to the readings and "the common prayer," but also, as local conditions may warrant, to those parts which pertain to the people, according to tho norm laid down in Art. 36 of this Constitution

Nevertheless steps should be taken so that the faithful may also be able to say or to sing together in Latin those parts of the Ordinary of the Mass which pertain to them.

So we see, the Pope is not out of line to make the Old Mass more available; rather, he is trying to assert the formal teachings and recommendations of the Vatican II document on the Liturgy.

So, given this evidence, I must ascertain that the person who was quoted in this article who refused to be named might have actually feared that her ignorance might be found out. I find it far more offensive not that she is uncatechized, but that she is very representative of the majority of Catholics who really haven't the slightest idea what the Church teaches or why. I'm offended because, we, the laity, have been neglected, we have been mislead, and now when someone legitimately tries to teach us the truth, we spout off ignorance that reflects upon us and NOT those who are responsible for the bad catechesis.

Oh, yes, I am offended. After all, the following soul so exemplifies the misunderstanding of the role of the Church AS an anchor:

The church "should be a rudder and help us move forward into the centuries," said Lou Gehosky, 66, of New Cumberland. "But this is worse than an anchor."

In other words, the Church is doing what she should; keeping us from going with the currents. In movies, those who go with the current tend to go over big waterfalls or dams. And we know about waterfalls and dams; they drag bodies down, hold them under and drown them, and if they eventually release them, they are no longer live bodies, but corpses.

Thank you, Jesus, for instituting Holy Mother Church, for providing us the Water of Life, the Anchor (ROCK) of safety, and the Eternal Truth that keeps us from being damned by the fickle yet powerful currents of modern times. Amen.

To Mr. Gehosky; if you want to let go of the anchor, go ahead. But we'd all prefer you hold on a little longer, and read the inscription on the anchor you currently condemn. That anchor is there to save you. Ask any sailor caught in a storm.

The pope's recent decrees provide more evidence of how conservative the Catholic hierarchy has become, said Chester Gillis, professor of theology at Georgetown University.

Well, in all honesty, Georgetown University has no credibilty here. They aren't actually Catholic. And basically, what Mr. Gillis is saying is that, once again, the Pope has professed that he, and the Catholic Church, are Catholic. How Shocking!

Pope John Paul II's 27-year tenure left that legacy.

Praise God and thank you, John Paul the Great!

Another example emerged recently in Harrisburg, when indulgences, pledges of personal sacrifice and worship intended to reduce the time souls spend in purgatory, were offered for pilgrimages to St. Patrick Cathedral during this, its 100th anniversary year.

Indulgences, whose abuse helped spur the Reformation, are understood to reduce the time a believer spends in purgatory after death. Downplayed after Vatican II, they were revived in 2000.

Shortly after his decree on the Latin Mass, Pope Benedict asserted that though other Christians might find salvation, Catholics represent the one true "Church of Christ."

OK, this quote is actually a conglomeration of formal ignorance, lazy journalism, and pretty much is a transition designed to throw people off. It's a strawman, a red herring, and plays only to the ignorance of the masses, both Catholic and non-Catholic.

Indulgences don't have anything to do with this article, and they have been completely misrepresented. They were, in fact, downplayed after Vatican II, but it had nothing to do with the abuses of bad Popes, but rather, with the complete spiritual acedia that actively quashed devotions in the THC-inspired air of the late 60's and early 70's.

And, in fact, the Catholic Church IS the "one Church of Christ". I wouldn't be Catholic if I didn't believe this. Nor would be the Pope.

People, listen to the Pope. Listen to John Paul II who TOLD you all to read the Documents of Vatican II. They're all readily available.

One of the things Vatican II recognized was a need for the active involvement of the laity in life in general. It is the job of the priest to preach the Gospel to us, to offer the Sacraments, and to "raise" us as children of God. The priest is called out of the world, so as to enable the children of the world to go out and spread the Good News of Christ. THAT is what is meant by "active participation". The Church is not the domain of the priest; but the priest is acting as our spiritual Father. He is our Shepherd. Vatican II defines this, and John Paul II continually taught that Man must be the way of the Church in the modern world, that all are called to holiness, all are called to this renewal. We, the laity, are in the world, here to serve the world...in order to bring the world to Christ.

Read the documents. Really. You can find them all HERE.

Morning Coffee Musings

DID YOU KNOW?

On this day in history, June 20,...Karol Wojtyla (Pope John Paul II) was baptized. I learned this from George Weigel's book, "Witness to Hope."





Other random information....

Tradition holds that Jesus was crucified at the age of 33. That was a bad year for Jesus.

A theological definition of Justice indicates to us that Justice is paying what is owed, or giving someone what they are due.

If there was Justice, I would be at home hiding under the covers, not at work. I couldn't get the day off. So not only must I suffer the injustice of the inability to escape the Evil Empire of my employment in general, but I actually have to go TODAY of all days. There is no justice. But on the flip side, I'm taking Monday and Tuesday off, and I will be enjoying my freedom with much relish and much praise to God.

On to more important things...

This week's Catholic Carnival is up over at Just Another Day of Catholic Pondering. Our hostess this week did a great job, as always! Go on over and read this week's offerings.

Can God be Trusted?

This last semester at school (which, incidentally was also my first as a grad student), I learned a great deal and it had a huge spiritual impact on me. Thank you, John Paul the Great! His writings have greatly illuminated huge theological realities I was never taught, I did not previously understand, and having now learned them, my entire outlook on life is different.

Though his writings, I have come to learn several things about humanity, leading me, of course, to recognize even my own deep imperfections and tendencies, and WHY they exist. It is not a way of avoiding responsibility for my actions; rather, I have come to see by understanding the root, how to overcome the challenges of original sin.

So often, I come across people who cite their situations and fall into a sinful path, using their (very real) sufferings as a justification to reject God once again, wanting others to bolster their guilty consciences as a way to appease them; they want someone to endorse the actions they know are wrong, they want someone to tell them that yes, they are correct and God has it wrong this time.

I'm often guilty of this.

It's part of the human condition; to want to be God, to know good and evil, and rather than seeking the good, so often we are looking to justify the evil.

It all goes back to the Garden of Eden. God gave free rein to Adam and Eve to eat of any tree or plant in the Garden...all but one, the tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. So what did Satan do? He arrived on scene as a serpent, twisted God's words, and suggested to Eve that God had lied to them. In fact, he didn't just suggest it, he said so outright without using the word "lie".

Eve corrected the Serpent; she resisted him, but in the end, his twisted form of "logic" overcame her. She gave in to the first temptation; doubt of God, doubt of His Word, doubt of His Love.

Let us consider this, because it is a foundation of everything we choose or don't choose: it comes down to whether we trust God or not.

Eve was tempted through doubt, and this doubt lead to Pride, and it was Pride that was the first sin. Doubt is not a sin; doubt is human, for God gave us free will and the ability to reason. We are meant to doubt, because this is what we use to discern good or evil. Even though evil had not been introduced into their lives, God knew what was coming and so our first parents had the ability to doubt or to accept. In the case of the serpent, Adam and Eve learned to doubt God. Through their doubt, they gave in to the Serpent's twisted and empty promise to be "like God". They gave in to the actual sin of Pride, and they ate of the fruit.

They learned disobedience, and immediately began to blame each other. They learned shame, and we see that as sin entered the world, doubt of God was proliferated and at its core, it {sin} ruptures relationships. It certainly ruptured humanity’s relationship with God.

This leads to our history, the history of humanity. Note that God NEVER did anything to disrupt the relationship with Man. God has always been faithful to His promises; it was us, as humanity, who turned our backs on God. It is always WE who turn away and choose to listen to the Serpent, that very creature that still whispers false promises to us, encouraging us to know better than God what is good for us.

Read the Bible; throughout history, it has ALWAYS been Man who severed the relationship with God and with others. And in the entire history of the Bible, it has always been God who initiated the reconciliation, through the law, through the prophets, through the incarnation of His only Son, sent to reverse the sin of Adam, through Mary's fiat, given to reverse the sin of Eve.

The entire Bible is a love story; it is about God seeking reunification with we who continue to reject Him. Jesus is the definitive answer, but we still have the responsibility to either trust God, or to fall back in distrust of God.

With every decision we make, the main question we need to ask of ourselves is this:

Do I trust God?

If we trust God, we will follow His precepts. We will remain faithful, especially when it's difficult. We will resist the lisp of the Serpent who seeks our ruin, but whose words are so sweet in our ears.

If we do not trust God, we will repeat the sin in the Garden; we will give in to our own preferences, our own Pride, and we will call our Pride the "Holy Spirit" and justify our actions and attitudes, even if they are in complete disagreement with the teaching authority established by Jesus Christ himself, that of the Magisterium.

The Garden we live in now is a complicated place, but it doesn't have to be so; in reality, we can make this very simple; we can either have childlike trust in God and His loving will for us...or we can beat our own path, leaving Christ bleeding on the Cross, suffering even in the face of our continued rejection of him.

Yet God has proven throughout history that He can be trusted; it is we, humanity, that continues to reject God.

The next time you have to make a big decision, spend time gazing upon the crucifix, the sign of ultimate love for us, and ask yourself if your own suffering even compares to what Jesus has done for you. Just as God sees you through the wounds of Christ, learn to look through Christ's wounds and see the Father...and then you will have your answer.

Living in the Moment

I spent a little time in Adoration this evening, just feeling the need to be with Jesus. My brain has been full of so much, my life is naught but clutter, and I'm terrified of what's just around the bend. I'm going to start Grad school in August, but all that's covered by the scholarship is 1/3 of the 5 credits I'll be taking. What about the other 2/3's and the cost of books? Where's the money coming from?

What of my job? I didn't get the job I thought I wanted, which is fine...God knows best, but now what? I don't even know where to look. Accepting my current position almost 5 years ago has proven to be professional suicide; the last few years has rendered my work and experience completely invalid because I've been off my career path for so long on this useless tangent.

As my current Manager and my immediate Supervisor observed in a recent meeting, my life is taking a very different turn, it's recognized by people around me....but what they don't realize is that I have nowhere to go. I am completely at God's mercy because I can't get myself out of this grave I've dug so deeply.

And then there's this upcoming weekend...I just learned that my brother, his girlfriend, and my Mom are going to spend the night at my house on Saturday, and this place is a complete catastrophe! The spare bedroom doubles as a storage room and some time ago I began a "cleanup" project with the goal of getting rid of stuff. All I did was shuffle it around and discover some of the plastic totes I store it all in is not completely full, and I have paper records that go back about 10 years. I can't just throw it away because it has identifying info on it, and last summer I didn't get a chance to burn it in my friends' fire pit...and shredding this stuff in my shredder would take years of tedium.

I deal with enough filing and tedium at work, thank you. (I'm horrible with filing...my inbox is usually stacked to the ceiling. I "file" by mentally indexing what comes in every day and pulling it out when it's needed...THEN it goes into the file.)

As you can see, I have a problem with living in the present. I'm always off to the next thing. I'm always looking ahead.

I began doing this many moons ago when I was looking to escape the chaos of our home, knowing that salvation laid in planning for the future, having goals, and working hard to reach them. I learned early that I couldn't depend on anyone, and unfortunately, in those years, I really didn't understand that God was there asking me to depend upon HIM, and in spite of everything I did, God still came through for me when it was needed, although I didn't realize it at the time.

I've always been very "driven" and very "goal oriented" and it's so hard for me to take a step back and let God handle things. And where to draw the line between actively carrying out the tasks to reach the unknown goal God has in mind, separating trust in God from the sins of complacence and sloth?

Tonight at Adoration, I came to realize that we are all in a culture of "tomorrow" without learning to have an appreciation for "today" much less "this very moment".

As Mother Angelica has said, Jesus wants us to ask what he wants of us in this very moment, RIGHT NOW, wherever we are and whatever we are doing.

I have such a hard time with this. It's so simple, but I can't seem to handle the present. I'm so attached to the future that I'm tripping over my own feet to get there. Perhaps if I could pay attention to NOW I would see the obstacles in my way.

My thoughts turned to my childhood. I remember those years before school started, or those long summer days when school was out. I remember how the time seemed endless, the moments blissful, even in our boredom, we didn't worry about tomorrow. Certainly, we considered exciting events in the future, but our excitement didn't take us out of fullness of the present. We knew all about stopping to smell the roses.

It didn't matter what time the sun set and rose. I didn't care what the weather was going to be like in five days (unless a big storm was predicted...that's another story). I didn't care about TIME or what was going to happen in the future. I knew that all that was in Mom and Dad's hands, and if there was something I was supposed to do, they would tell me about it. I didn't have to set the alarm to get up in the morning...Mom would get us up. Mom would make dinner, and if she wasn't there, Dad would cook Spam and junket, or pizza and junket, and if Mom and Dad couldn't be there, then there would be a relative or a neighbor or someone else to provide for us. We didn't have to question anything. We could just live and do what we were told and all was well (mostly).

I really wish I could find this kind of faith in the Father in Heaven. I really wish I could learn how to be a child again, and not worry to much. Yes, the tasks I've been given are far more complicated and are time-bound, but within those times, there are many moments...why can't I just live those moments and TRUST in God to provide any additional direction?

I'm still worried about paying for Grad school. (Incidentally, I got the grade on my last paper today...a 98! God is so good, and John Paul II is my patron saint!). With this success under my belt, I am looking forward to further education, knowing I can do this, even if not to that level if carry a greater course load. I'm still worried about where to look for my next job because everything I worked so hard to know is useless.

So for now, the only thing I can focus upon is living in the moment, taking life one second, one minute at a time...because that's the only place where any of us can find Jesus. That's the only place we can come to understand our purpose, by asking constantly, "What is Jesus asking of me RIGHT NOW?"

Tomorrow will take care of itself...the Gospel makes this so clear, but how many of us heed those words?

News and Theology

OK, first of all, the news part. There isn't any. I haven't heard anything so that means that I'll either get a letter in the mail stating, "Thanks but No Thanks", they weren't able to finish their first round of interviews yet, or they are sorting through the candidates and have yet to call for the second interview. All in God's time.

Moving on to the Theology part:

From today's Gospel reading:

John 14:27-31a (Last verses)

"I will no longer speak much with you, for the ruler of the world is coming. he has no power over me, but the world must know that I love the Father and that I do just as the Father has commanded me."

This class definitely has me making connections in scripture. I just shot off a note to my professor because today's Gospel seems to demonstrate a very profound link between the Trinity, the divine and human dimensions of Jesus in relation to the Father in expiation for sin (ie perfect obedience), the dignity of humanity in the image and likeness of God, and the similarity in how Jesus responds to the Father's commands as a demonstration and lesson to us all. And I say this because he shows us by example how we must respond to His commands within, that being the conscience, which is the Holy Spirit convincing us of sin in relation to the definitive judgment that already took place (Satan), and pointing us to the all-good, which is God.

Whew! Did you get all that?! I'm not sure I did, and it's not how I phrased it in the question posed to my professor. It's one thing to summarize it lightly here, another entirely to send a question to my professor knowing what he knows, his knowing what he has taught us, and then to be specific enough without laying the foundational theology it would be necessary to explain if I were to write a solid post on this idea.

Perhaps I'll expand on this idea if the prof. can confirm my imperfect understanding. I do NOT want to spend a bunch of time on a post only to find out I've just opened up a can of Gnostic on myself.

I Came Home to Divine Mercy

Divine Mercy is part of my conversion story - a part that wasn't told in that series of posts.

When I was living in the darkness of my sin, working nights, and basically, embracing the total darkness that was my life, a co-worker gave me some books to read while at my post at night: The Left Behind series.

I was seeking God at the time, sensing my separation, sensing his call, but I was at a loss as to what to do. I remember thinking that maybe I should find a priest, make an appointment, and pose my questions to him. But who? What church? Weren't priests too busy to deal with the likes of me? And if I DID find a priest, I was quite certain he would tell me I needed to go to Confession, and I didn't want to and would be at a loss to explain why. I feared being pressured into something I didn't want to do, so I ran from the idea.

And because I had nowhere to go, I went nowhere...or so I thought.

One Christmas, Mom had given my brother and I a CD with the Divine Mercy prayer on it, along with a pamphlet explaining the devotion and how to pray the chaplet. I remember finding the CD and the pamphlet, and I read it over suspiciously, thinking it was too easy. It also said I had to go to Confession...so at first, I tossed it aside. Something told me not to throw it away, though, so I added it to my collection of eclectic things that didn't otherwise have a place in my home and my life.

But as I was reading the "Left Behind" books, I found that I was offended by the outright anti-Catholicism expressed within the pages, including the idea that the Pope became the right-hand man of the Antichrist. I couldn't explain why I was so offended, but it was like someone was attacking my Mother. Attack me all you want...but do NOT mess with my Mother!

I was conflicted, but somehow, these books drew me into an understanding that I had been rejecting God, and I had to make my peace with Him...and that move was mine. I didn't believe in the Rapture, but it did come to me that if God wanted to wipe me off the face of the earth, he would do it. If he wanted to cause the earth to erupt into earthquakes and raining fire, he could do it.

And always, I had the presence of the crucifix on the wall of my livingroom - because it wasn't home without that. Thank you, Mom.

So through all this introspection, I went back to Divine Mercy, not really believing the promises to St. Faustina, but I really wanted to. I needed to believe, and I needed mercy.

But I could not leave the life I was living behind me. I could not, in good conscience, come to Jesus begging for his mercy without a true desire to change. Somehow I understood this, so I put the pamphlet down again.

Then finally, I picked it up, and I found a rosary buried in a box somewhere, and I prayed the Chaplet of Divine Mercy. I apologized to Jesus that I could not go to Confession, but I begged for Mercy just the same.

I think I might have prayed it a few other times, and then put it away again.

I credit Divine Mercy for bringing me home, for it was shortly after these prayers that my struggle to return to Confession began in earnest. I began going to Mass somewhat regularly, almost always receiving communion, but still feeling like an outsider. I always sat in the back of the church, not wanting to approach the Holy of Holies, as though Jesus didn't know I was there!

And he drew me on, even as I ran away...His Mercy continued to endure. I so desired mercy, but I was terrified to approach. I could not trust. My life had beaten all forms of trust out of me, such that I could not even trust God.

Jesus never gave up on me, and he doused me with those rays of Mercy until finally, finally, I came home. In my conversion story I explained some of that experience, the agony and ecstasy of it, but I don't think mere words can possibly convey the reality of this incredible experience of Divine Mercy.

When I bought my townhome, I had bare walls, so I requested art for Christmas and birthday gifts. Specifically religious art. I can't remember if I requested Divine Mercy specifically or whether the Lord put it on her heart, but my Mom gave me a Divine Mercy image which I had blessed on Divine Mercy Sunday a couple years ago. It now hangs on my livingroom wall next to a very realistic crucified Jesus, and I find that I cannot venerate one without the other, for they are one in the same.

I have another picture that combines the Sacred Heart of Jesus (another image I grew up with) and the rays of Divine Mercy. No one can enter my home without seeing these things.

Thanks be to God, the Divine Mercy of Jesus brought me home and to this day envelopes me in all my sinfulness, all my imperfections, and brings me to him with all his Divine Love.

If you are struggling with your faith, if you have been away for a long time, just pray this chaplet...you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.

For those interested, my Conversion story can be found here. Warning: many links!

The Grace of Suffering

This morning I woke up with knots in my stomach, already shaking as I considered the job ahead of me - returning to work after my blessed week off. En route to work I prayed my "emergency novena" (rosary and 9 memorares), and confessed to God that I know I have to do this, I don't know why, I don't have a choice, and I don't want to embrace this cross. So I offered him the agony of wanting to escape my suffering and the reality of my own unworthiness. I asked for help in overcoming my unwilling spirit.

God answered, and although the day was busy, there was a certain grace that seemed to accompany me all day long.

During lunch, I did some studying, reading the course notes on Salvici Doloris, which is the Encyclical I read over the weekend.

For the class I'm taking, we have the choice of one of several options for the paper due in April, and I have chosen the topic on what John Paul II says about the meaning of suffering and how it is redemptive. I have no idea what I'm going to say but I have determined that I need to do ALL the reading before even considering my outline because so far, everything seems to work together. Such is Catholic theology; it is a cohesive whole.

But until my lunch break, I wasn't really understanding the message John Paul II was trying to get across; but then came the revelation.

As I read the course notes, suddenly it hit me; I'm LIVING this encyclical, and somehow, I am seeing my journey reflected his words and in the course notes that give an explanation.

John Paul II, in Salvici Doloris, uses a question/answer dynamic to explain the theology of suffering and redemption. Within this, he describes how a suffering person is driven to ask questions about the reasons for the suffering, the meaning of the suffering; in other words, the suffering soul is going to God for the answers to this pain.

God welcomes these questions, and is of course prepeared to answer them, for He draws very near to suffering souls. Through their suffering, He directs them to Jesus Christ and the cross that redeemed us; he points to the words of Jesus, he who asks us to take up our crosses and follow him. That is to say, the invitation of Jesus to us all to unite the sufferings of this life with his, and it is through this surrender that we find the answers and we come to understand how suffering is salvific.

God does not give simple answers, however, I've found that when we are truly open to those answers, they are simplicity in themselves, for the understanding is not temporal but spiritual, not intellectual, but interior.

Through my work, I have been suffering...my regular readers will testify to my whining, my angst, and we are all in agreement that I need to get away. But every time I turn around, I find I am penned in with nowhwere to go. I can't just quit; I have to pay for my mortgage. I know that God lead me to the home I now "own" (which of course owns me!), I have to consider my dogs, those lives I have agreed to steward. I have to be responsible; God does not ask us to walk away from obligations - such actions are folly. So I find I am trapped.

While yes, I am seeking a way out, I have been spending far more time in seeking God's will and asking those very questions detailed by John Paul II. Why am I suffering? Why is this so difficult? Why do I have nowhere to go? What is the MEANING of this? And ultimately, my question is narrowed down to, "Is this all there is? What does my life mean? Where does God want me to serve Him?"

I have posted a few times about seeking spiritual direction and my agony over this; my unwillingness to pursue it...my recognition of the need for it. I am a lost soul, I am a suffering soul, and I have come to realize that without God, my life has no meaning.

I cannot go on this way. On Sunday after communion I couldn't seem to pray so I looked up at the crucifix, trying to understand more clearly what Jesus did for us. Suddenly I felt so far away from him, the seperation was almost tangible. I recognized my unworthiness and my own inability to overcome my own sinfulness. I fought hard to hold back the tears, suddenly understanding how far I am from union with God. I became absolutely THIRSTY for this unexplainable union with God; and this, this...is the source of my agony. The seperation from God, the desire and need for union with Him.

So today, as I sat at my desk, staring at my course notes, all of this was running through my mind and I realized that God was using my employment to drive me into asking those questions; the deep questions where the answer will be found if I will only find the courage to go deeper. The answer to all of my questions is found on the Cross, and the only way to understand the Cross is through suffering. The only way to find the answers is to suffer for them, suffer in them, and offer that suffering on behalf of something or someone better. To look for the meaning in that suffering, where God draws near and provides the answers to a soul that is finally listening.

Ultimately, my questions and the answers to them are not about employment, the house, or the stuff I own. It is not about the angst that is my daily life. Rather, it is a spiritual affair, leading down the path to holiness if I should be willing to walk that path. That is not to say that I should be a doormat and not seek another position more in line with my true gifts. Quite the opposite! What I came to realize is that if I am not first seeking God, I will not find the answers, I will not discover my true gifts or my true Vocation UNLESS I am willing to surrender my will to wherever God wants to lead me.

I cannot do this alone.

This weekend I realized that my angst about finding a spiritual director is the same torturous experience I had when I was fighting God about returning to Confession; it was all about fear.

Who is the author of fear?

So I sent a note to a priest I highly respect and whose advice I trust, deciding that this is the first step in submission to God's will; to find someone to hold me accountable and help me stop fighting God so hard. To lead me through this suffering to the answers which will never be found in another job. I would trust him and, if he sees fit, I would trust his recommendation to another. I submit this decision to God alone.

Ironically, I sent the note before I read the encyclical and I think this was key; I first had to overcome my fear and take the first step before God would reveal to me WHY I was taking that step.

I do not know what is going to happen at work or with my potential spiritual direction, but I do know this; this afternoon when I realized the meaning of my suffering, suddenly I was filled with a sense of peace and joy that I could not deny. Somehow, in the midst of my suffering, there is a certain amount of peace and I can only pray that this peace continues as I am truly seeking God's will through this.

Many of you have expressed that you are praying for me. Thank you. Prayers are powerful.