REDNECK JOKES!

OK, everyone, I need to have some fun. I live in the redneck portion of my metro area, and the other day someone commented that one of the local radio stations refers to a certain interchange near me as the "redneck bottleneck". I'm still lauging. We have MORE pickups per capita here than Texas, I'd wager. And although Soccar Moms are up there, too, the rednecks crowd them out.

Today I happened to hear Jeff Foxworthy again, and I've always been a fan. So I'm going to start with the redneck jokes I remember, and I'm asking all commenters to post their own. Go ahead and post what you remember from Jeff Foxworthy, but, to be fair, if you're quoting him or what you think he said, please cite him with a "JF" at the end of your post.

That way, those of you who are speaking from experience or observation can be recognized as being kings and queens of redneckdome! LOL!

So it begins....

If your grammy keeps a spit-cup on the ironin' board...You just might be a redneck.

If you have ever listed "ammo" on your Christmas list....

If your family tree does NOT fork....

If your HOUSE has wheels and your car DOESN'T.....

If you go to family reunions to look for a DATE....

If you back up your truck and hit the brakes hard to do a donut to unload it....

If hitting a deer at 65 mph is your idea of hunting...

If your Salad bowls all say "cool whip" on the side....

If your dress is strapless, but your bra isn't....

If you have to miss 10th grade because of jury duty...

(all from Jeff Foxworthy)