Here's an excerpt:
Now, because Joey got up all the kids get up and start wandering around like dazed primates. They don't even know why they got up. They just know that one of their own got up and there were no consequences so...it's get up time. So I'm trying to turn the stroller around to come back down the aisle to bring the consequences and then it happens. IT. The worst thing that could happen. In my efforts to turn around I knock over my soda. My Gulp. My Super Big Gulp. My 64 oz of black bubbly mess lands with a thud loud enough for everyone in the hottest cafeteria in the world to turn around and look at me. The baby heard the thud, got scared, turned her head quickly into the side of the stroller and is now inhaling all the air in the room in order to scream the scream of angry baby anguish in an echoing cafeteria. While she's still inhaling, the soda spreads rapidly under the chairs of everyone in a ten yard area.
Then the scream happens. Every person with eyes looks up at the sweaty irresponsible Dad who clearly isn't capable of watching his children. Then people look down on the floor at the expanding mess. They're lifting their feet. The speech stops.
I slowly reach over, pick up the screaming baby, put her on my shoulder, and begin dragging the stroller backwards down the aisle, leaving an oozy trail behind me like a carbonated slug. After a few seconds where I was the focal point of the entire universe, the speech starts up again and a few people moved down a few chairs to avoid the mess.
Go read the rest!
I just love parents. They both frustrate and amaze me...I know all about parents who just drop off their kids and expect others to care for them...and others do, for who could abandon a child? Only a parent. And who can find all the love to care for all the children sent their way? Only a parent.
One of the incongruities of life.
And I'm constantly amazed by the parents who step up to deal with everything that comes their way...and the humor in all that transpires!
I only hope one of the "drop off" parents involved reads this post and realizes that their kids are awesome human beings in spite of them!
OK, that was mean, but sadly...it's all too often true.
Many of you know what I'm talking about, and it doesn't matter...just GO READ!