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Saturday, July 22, 2006

The Disordered Objectification

I deal with crime victims and fraudmongers. That's what I get paid to do. And I don't know how much of my tongue will be missing when God finally gets me out of this job.

Some time ago, I blogged about a man from Iraq, a fan of Saddam Hussein, who compared his car being stolen to someeone having sex with his wife. He said he would not want her anymore after this, and actually SAID that it was like someone was having sex with his car.

(I wish I could banish the mental image that came so unbidden!)

I was offended by this...highly offended, but given his political and moral hero, I let it go realizing that the man may very well be deranged due to his cultural origins and political indoctrination, and thus perhaps he had reason (although wrong) for his disordered thought.

Then just this week, I spoke with a man, AMERICAN grew up here, and he said nearly the same thing. He compared his car to his girlfriend. He said that he wasn't sure that he would want his car back because it felt like the same thing as someone having sex with his girlfriend. He stopped just short of saying that it's like someone having sex with his car. I simply interrupted him and moved on to the next item of business.

I had to tightly reign in my very strong desire to reach through the phone, grab this asshole by the throat and explain to him that as a woman, I am not an object, neither is his girlfriend. 'Scuse the French, and no offense to those from France.

I would like to make something very, very very clear:

* A car is an object. It is a thing that is thus acted upon in order to be of any use at all.

* A woman is NOT an object. She is a person, and she has priceless value which does not require being acted upon in order to make her valuable.


Has this been understood by everyone? A WOMAN IS *NOT* AN OBJECT!

If your house is broken into, if your wallet is stolen, if your car, motorcycle, etc., is stolen, and you DARE to compare this to someone having sex with your girlfriend or wife, then you have a very serious problem. This is so disordered it is far beyond words.

Anyone who compares their girlfriend or wife to an object has clearly underscored the fact that they have objectified this priceless woman in their life. They have proven what Pope John Paul the Great said in Theology of the Body, and it PROVES beyond a doubt that radical feminism has failed. It PROVES that the prolific use of sex to define a relationship, and ourselves in relation to another or to ourselves has done NOTHING but deman us from being human to being mere objects.

Men, the women in your life are not cars, and if you see them as such, it proves you are using them. Stop doing this, take a serious self-inventory, amd realize that men and women who do not treat each other as objects are infinitely healthier in mind, body, and soul.

If you are one of these people who compares the car or other object to the woman, then realize you are living a double standard. Most of us own cars which have had other owners. Most people have multiple sexual partners in today's culture, thus the woman (or man) comes already "used". This has done nothing to further the value of life in our society, but rather, demeans it so completely so as to make it comparable only to whatever handy thing can be used and discarded without another thought.

If anyone ever again makes the mistake of making this satanic comparison, damn the recorder and damn the professionalism that censures my sharing of the truth. I'm not sure I can afford to lose another piece of my tongue just to keep my job...for without a tongue to speak to God's glory, then what good am I?

Oh, that's right...I'm a woman. As a woman I have infinite value. I cannot be compared to a heifer, a cow, a car, or a house. I am worth far more, and if you can't bother to buy me a ring, then your value as a man ain't even worth the ground I walk on.

This is a two way street...we need to bring respect for ourselves, our bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit, and respect for each other back into the culture.

Maybe the culture won't value us, and maybe we'll go dateless or husbandless or wifeless for taking the high moral ground. But Jesus never said it would be easy...he only said that He'd be with us. So let's all get a backbone and if you hear anyone in your life spitting out the vile trash that betrays their objectification of people in their lives they claim to care about, then let them have it with both verbal barrels. This cannot continue in our culture. We are children of God, and we should start behaving as the royalty we are, as opposed to the barbarians we have so often chosen to be.

8 comments:

TECH said...

I RESPECT YOUR POSITION AS A ADVOCATE FOR THOSE WHO SEEM TO BE ON THE SHORT END OF THE STICK, BUT LET'S NOT LOSE SIGHT OF WHAT OUR LORD JESUS CHRIST CAME TO DO, SHOW LOVE TO ALL. TO LET SOME ONE HAVE IT WITH "BOTH VERBAL BARRELS" JUST DOESEN'T SOUND CHRIST LIKE. DON'T GET ME WRONG I HATE IT TO WHEN THE BULLY SEEMS TO ALWAYS BE ON TOP, BUT THE BIBLE SAYS NOT FOR LONG; TRUST AND BELEIVE HIS DAY IS COMING. GOD PROMISED THAT, AND HE IS NOT SLACK ON HIS PROMISES. DON'T BECOME WHAT YOU HATE THE MOST LET'S NOT FOR GET JESUS DIED FOR ALL SINNERS EVEN THE ONE'S YOU AND I LOATHE THE MOST, GOD BLESS YOU FRIEND

Adoro Te Devote said...

Tech,

Thank you for your comment. However, I have to respectfully disagree. Jesus sure let loose with both verbal barrels, or have you never read the Gospel of John? And don't forget about the incident in the temple when he fashioned a whip and went after the traders and money changers. He sure wasn't the meek and gentle lamb we tend to want to see him as today.

Jesus, while loving, charitable, etc., did not let stuff slide and had no problem telling it like it was. I take my example from Him.

As a side note, I'm not sure you're aware that when you post in all caps, it gives the impression of "SHOUTING", and does affect readability for some people. It can tend to overpower your true intention and what you are really conveying. I realize that you certainly are NOT "shouting" at me or anyone else, but it is the overall tone of your post due to the use of caps.

God bless you and thanks again for your comment! :-)

Therese said...

Adoro,
Hard job you have!!! I used to bartend years ago as an extra job and had to quit because I began to despise these people I had to wait on. I was treated like an object from the time I came in to the time I left. After a year I couldn't take it anymore and would find myself talking to myself under my breath...There wasn't any way to defend myself from their disgusting comments. I also began to see my husband as less than a real man... began to lump them all together. Ha! It was hard to separate being so immersed in icky-ness. I am glad God gave me the grace to see I just couldn't deal with it and leave--the $$ was fantastic but not worth it. I think you are doing a great job. I agree with you in that when people cross my boundaries they are made aware of it ASAP. I don't allow it any longer. I am a little over 40 and it has taken over twenty years to confront others. I always think people are good until they show they are being bad and I let them know I am quite aware of it!! I have no obligation to be used by anyone and it won't happen without my responding. I am a woman and should expect excellent behavior from men in particular--when I don't get it they are told period. I am not an aggressive person as I am sure you aren't but no one is going to abuse me. Well, actually I can't stop that part can I? but No one will do it without my telling them I know what they doing and DO NOT accept it! I wish other men would be the ones policing their fellow men but it doesn't seem to be happening. I cannot believe the rudeness at times. It is extremely hurtful and frightening. There are times that you of course cannot respond out of fear for a worse reaction. Physical. You have to be prudential I guess, but I am tired of being treated poorly or seeing anyone treated that way and I cannot watch it and say nothing.
God Bless and thank you for your post!!

bookstopper said...

As a young man, I'm sick of people who treat the opposite sex like objects. It seems other men (at least the visible ones) tend to treat women so poorly for so long that they tend to EXPECT the vile treatment as a sign of masculinity. There is another side to the coin too...feminists have believed for a while that women should turn the tables and objectify men rather than fighting a disordered view of others with a rightly ordered one. The result is a spiral into a cycle of objectification that has already tanked much of the morality in our culture.

There's light at the end of the tunnel though. In this day of casual sex, abortion, contraception, and pornography, sin demonstrates that it can rarely compete in fecundity to charity. God has blessed enough of us enough so that we can fortify ourselves against the ravages of destructive philosophies and amoral ideologies. Ladies, I'm going to leave you today with the same advice I give myself: if you have a vocation for marriage, never stop searching for a man whose faith shows. Compromise on looks, wedding size, and emotional feelings if you have to, but never compromise on faith, because that is what matters.

bookstopper said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
bookstopper said...

sorry for the double post, I've been having problems leaving comments on here

Adoro Te Devote said...

bookstopper,

Thanks for commenting...I took care of that double post for you. :-)

I agree with you completely. Modern feminism has caused nothing but harm to society. The original feminists, those who fought for the right to vote, for the right to be recognized as full citizens, etc., they are rolling in their graves right now. They were pro-life, they were pro-family, they were pro-morals and pro-God. Modern feminists are against all that is good.

Personally, I think it's very difficult to meet a man who encompasses the values that are important to me, but it seems that the younger generation is finding that moral footing. Doesn't help me, but I am hopeful that since those older than I, and those of my decade have made such a moral wreck of things that the younger generations can witness this and change things.

bookstopper said...

Well, I don't know about the numbers of my generation that have stepped up and called our society on its lack of morality, but I do know that I can see it. The high American culture that you see in movies and TV is still sliding towards decay, so there's likely to be an even greater number of morally conscious people from the decades after me...

All the while, there will be liberals saying that we are knuckle-dragging thugs who want to undo the reforms of the last 100 years or so of liberalism. Some of those reforms were unwise or immoral (they should be undone), while others are perfectly fine. My point is that we need to create a constructive vision of the future based on catholic morality, common sense, and family values