tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post5436010496588171478..comments2023-09-22T06:56:46.508-05:00Comments on Adoro te Devote: Everyone's an ExpertAdorohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02853244433854822731noreply@blogger.comBlogger20125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-75956618180967515712009-08-03T14:42:07.026-05:002009-08-03T14:42:07.026-05:00VA ~ That's HILARIOUS and so true! NO PRESSUR...VA ~ That's HILARIOUS and so true! NO PRESSURE! lol! God bless you!Adorohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02853244433854822731noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-12175908657841164742009-07-30T19:00:19.435-05:002009-07-30T19:00:19.435-05:00Amen, amen, amen!
I was a bit miffed when some of...Amen, amen, amen!<br /><br />I was a bit miffed when some of the people close to me blabbed about my discernment when I wasn't at all ready to talk about it yet. Especially not when they defended themselves with "this affects me as well". There's a difference between me being polite and including you in some musings and me asking you to take over direction of my life :)<br /><br />Now that my entrance date is set, it's pretty much common knowledge, and I'm out of the woods for discernment advice, thank God. I just hope I may persevere because apparently the personal happiness of 439 people depends on it :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-52994986751814457662009-07-28T18:52:33.747-05:002009-07-28T18:52:33.747-05:00As a Caucasian Irish woman, when I got engaged to ...As a Caucasian Irish woman, when I got engaged to a Trinidadian man, I received lots of advice not to marry a black man. That I would regret it if I did......<br /><br />In September we will be celebrating our 40th Wedding Anniversary. <br /><br />So much for advice!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-59570988074811954182009-07-28T09:35:57.496-05:002009-07-28T09:35:57.496-05:00In defense of those suggesting the Nashville Domin...In defense of those suggesting the Nashville Dominicans, they may not realize you have heard of them. :) I live in Nashville and grew up in Nashville and I hadn't heard of the Nashville Dominicans until I was nearly thirty! All that was on the other side of town, ya know. That's a sad thing to admit.<br /><br />People do need quit with the unsolicited advise. I currently have two children with youngest about 20 months, so it is getting to be time for the next one. My father-in-law volunteered, out of the blue, that two is plenty and we don't need anymore. Well he doesn't get a vote and he needs to just keep that to himself!Jennynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-17971610243079455632009-07-27T22:50:16.991-05:002009-07-27T22:50:16.991-05:00IT'S SO TRUE!!!
Seriously, what IS it with th...IT'S SO TRUE!!!<br /><br />Seriously, what IS it with the Carmelites? I love them, I do, but why are they the only ones anyone ever knows??? I mean, no one ever even SEES them!<br /><br />Oh, yah, and "Mother Angelica's nuns." Mention them one more time. I dare you. <br /><br />Great post, Adoro. LOL!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-70421165097416427832009-07-27T21:48:43.002-05:002009-07-27T21:48:43.002-05:00Three thumbs up, Adoro. (I'm borrowing one fro...Three thumbs up, Adoro. (I'm borrowing one from the library. It's due back in a couple weeks but I'll renew it if you keep posting stuff like this.)<br /><br />I need a bunch of sleep and prayer and such before I can give a proper response - which may be brief or silence.Hidden Onehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06042188431683942338noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-81962506321431499992009-07-27T20:46:47.717-05:002009-07-27T20:46:47.717-05:00Anne ~ ROFL! I actually alluded to some of the &q...Anne ~ ROFL! I actually alluded to some of the "dating advice" in my most recent post, but didn't bring up the large family stuff. I've seen over and over with large families just the comments you're talking about. And it's shocking to me. I would NEVER consider given a mother "advice" about how many children she should or shouldn't have, etc, and can't believe anyone would! <br /><br />The BEST response I ever heard though, was one I think I read on a blog. The woman in question happened to be a medical doctor, and knew very well the issues with contraception. Yet there she was with her three children while a perfect stranger accosted her and asked her if she knew about birth control, etc. She looked this perfect stranger in the eye and said, "Thank you SO MUCH for your concern with my reproductive system!" <br /><br />ROFL! (Personally I love big families and hate the fact they take so much abuse!)Adorohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02853244433854822731noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-45751801495213858282009-07-27T20:18:08.281-05:002009-07-27T20:18:08.281-05:00I hope too, that you remember that although you ar...I hope too, that you remember that although you are in a unique position of discernment to religious life, others also deal with constant advice and criticisms from people who believe that they know best. As a married mother, I was told who I should marry, where we should marry, where we should honeymoon, how many children we should have, and how dare we have so many children, don't you know how they are made and how to stop them, then at the grocery store-"what are you feeding, an army? etc, etc, etc- we all get it all the time! It is not easy living your faith, no matter how you live it. I get ambushed by my non-Catholic sister all the time, I get ambushed by my sister who is more strict in her faith than I am, I got ambushed by you who didn't like my Ronald Rolheiser quote. My point is, if you let all of that stuff eat at you, it'll kill you! Enjoy who you are, enjoy your relationship with God and whatever you do to maintain and enhance that relationship. Don't let anyone's comments on what you should do bother you, including mine. Most of all, God is madly in love with you and nothing else matters! Peace my friend, with prayers...Annehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06195528409761980551noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-66686345335373760892009-07-27T19:23:32.757-05:002009-07-27T19:23:32.757-05:00I have definitely witnessed a parish getting over-...I have definitely witnessed a parish getting over-excited by someone's discernment. It hasn't happened to me because I try to keep things relatively quiet, but I have seen it happen with young men applying to seminary. The pressure must be incredible. What if the man begins seminary and then discerns that he is not being called to the priesthood? <br /><br />Discernment is like dating. No one wants your thoughts on who you should be dating or whether or not you're going to marry the person you're dating now. :)Julianoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-46725795376704339942009-07-27T17:46:00.115-05:002009-07-27T17:46:00.115-05:00If it's any consolation, people do the exact s...If it's any consolation, people do the exact same thing to people whom they think should date their cousin or whom they think should marry that nice boy whom the poor date-ee cannot stand.<br /><br />But there's a lot more dating than discerning going on, so the effects are spread out over thousands of victims, reducing the numbers and stress on each individual. :)Bansheehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12594214770417497135noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-8130037072836913232009-07-27T16:22:16.844-05:002009-07-27T16:22:16.844-05:00You know who ~ Um, sorry...my last comment meant t...You know who ~ Um, sorry...my last comment meant to indicate permission already received from an email from someone in discernment NOW. :-) But I'll take another look at your emails too and see if maybe there's a section that might work here...hmmm....Adoronoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-66169506997389667732009-07-27T16:19:52.579-05:002009-07-27T16:19:52.579-05:00you have my permission! :-) (If I had plurk's...you have my permission! :-) (If I had plurk's emoticon's, it would be :-P)!YouKnowWhonoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-72911125510621931012009-07-27T14:38:33.543-05:002009-07-27T14:38:33.543-05:00Hmm...that's a good question. I think that dep...Hmm...that's a good question. I think that depends on the person and goes back to some people who are "serial advice-givers" who don't realize they know they are doing it. Their idea of "supporting sentiment" is to fall back on advice giving. It's their default. <br /><br />For other people, their idea of "supporting sentiment" is simply saying, "I know this is hard and I'm praying for you." and I would say that's the proper definition of that term. Others may have differing definitions so I can only speak for myself here. <br /><br />As far as sharing personal experience, i.e. "This is what happened to me and how I handled it" and leaving it at that...that's not advice. In fact, I've been getting a lot of emails with personal experience and with permission I'll be posting one of those emails later so that my readers can see that truly, I'm not speaking ONLY of myself here but am truly trying to convey what we all experience!Adorohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02853244433854822731noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-24050208171523714462009-07-27T14:25:23.837-05:002009-07-27T14:25:23.837-05:00Just curious... where is the line between 'sup...Just curious... where is the line between 'supporting sentiment' and advice? For example, would "pray, wait and don't rush" be considered advice? Is sharing a personal experience of your own discernment considered advice? Or are these supporting statements?a regular readernoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-43311176555734490042009-07-27T09:14:24.665-05:002009-07-27T09:14:24.665-05:00Anne ~ Just wanted to tag on a note that I didn&#...Anne ~ Just wanted to tag on a note that I didn't mean to jump all over you! Just want you to understand what we go through.Adorohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02853244433854822731noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-24224653916144159872009-07-27T07:51:16.895-05:002009-07-27T07:51:16.895-05:00This is a great rant! I pray that others who are d...This is a great rant! I pray that others who are discerning their particular religious life find their way to it for insight, relief, and a salutary laugh.<br /><br />So much of the particular path to a certain religious community is about the secret life of the soul with God, in both conscious and unconscious ways. This makes everyone's advice suspect, excepting those whom the Spirit leads us to trust either because of their own holiness or intimate knowledge of us as Christians and discerners.<br /><br />For many one of the unexpected challenges of religious life is that suddenly our life with God becomes a public property. This has tremendous blessings, such as the immense privilege to pray for and with the world as we stay faithful to the Hours, but it can also be challenge because everyone wants a piece of you and to impose their (sometimes uninformed) dreams and visions upon you.<br /><br />Peace!Brother Charleshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07780326836452864455noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-34034070737922697462009-07-27T07:02:01.416-05:002009-07-27T07:02:01.416-05:00Father ~ Exactly, and thank you!
Anne ~ Actually,...Father ~ Exactly, and thank you!<br /><br />Anne ~ Actually, you're way off base in surmising that this is what I'm experiencing now. I actually wrote this post inspired by and in response to many people who have contacted me privately and shared their own experiences with this. <br /><br />As far as recognizing the good intentions of the people who offer advice...um, not sure how to phrase this next part...did you actually read the entire post? I wrote EXTENSIVELY about the fact that I realize that and all we discerners realize that fact. Which is why we feel like rugs a lot of the time because we're EXHAUSTED and really feel quite sick from all the salt we're having to swallow all the time. <br /><br />Kathreja ~ If it's helpful, then yes, use it! :-)Adorohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02853244433854822731noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-28709428683358785312009-07-27T04:59:05.201-05:002009-07-27T04:59:05.201-05:00Adoro;
On behalf myself, a fellow discerner, I sa...Adoro;<br /><br />On behalf myself, a fellow discerner, I say AMEN and Thank you and I just may steal...erm...quote heavily your post for on own blog.Kathttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02383107414127510288noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-41202385390240767112009-07-27T03:38:42.468-05:002009-07-27T03:38:42.468-05:00I haven't been keeping up with your posts on a...I haven't been keeping up with your posts on a regular basis, but from the overall gist I understand that you seem to be suffering from people who won't leave you alone to make your choices with the help of God and no one else. I wonder if everyone is so eager to give advice simply because they love you and are so excited for you and they want to be a part of the most important decision of your life. As with all advice, I'm sure you are always quite free to take it or leave it. I am praying for your peace of mind and soul in what is obviously a stressful time. You know that in the end, whatever way you choose to go, it is God who has already done that choosing for you and it doesn't matter what other people say. Maybe adding a grain of salt to the unwelcome advice given would give it a little flavor and make it easier to accept the words without having to actually follow the advice. Peace my friend!Annehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06195528409761980551noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-15170815.post-77895404501038211832009-07-27T00:19:08.352-05:002009-07-27T00:19:08.352-05:00One of the greatest fears of discernment is precis...One of the greatest fears of discernment is precisely the situation you describe. Word gets out that so-and-so is discerning, and they immediately become the new seminarian/novice without any consideration as to what they're discerning. It might be 3 years before a man enters a 6-year seminary program, but people in the parish are already planning the first Mass of thanksgiving.<br /><br />Speaking as one who has undergone much discernment, and will be so bold as to speak for those who are discerning: Thank you for your prayers and support, but please leave the discernment to the discerner!Father Cory Stichahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16426512153670141621noreply@blogger.com